171 million people voted for the BJP.
That’s a new world record.
Congress 2009: 153 million.
Obama 2008: 69 million.

80 million people watched Kolaveri D on YouTube.
135 million Indians watched the 2011 World Cup cricket final.
171 million Indians voted for the BJP in 2014.

Directions from the 2014 electorate…
No Left turns and U-turns.
Turn Right and keep straight.

Bees Saal Baad finally gets a sequel.
Greatest mandate since 1984 or…
Tees Saal Baad.

End of the Lohiaites?
LS Seats: Mulayam (5), Laloo (5), Nitish (2), Ajit (0).
(Paswan: 0 in 2009, survives with the help of Modi in 2014)

PM pretenders…
Pappu: No numbers even for Opposition Leader.
Kejri: No entry to Lok Sabha.
Nitish: 2 seats.

Making chai for The Wife.
She came tired from office and said…
Chaiwallah Pradhan Mantri bana hai, kamse kam chai to bana do!

2002-14: Blow to Modi.
2014: Blow to Modi Haters.

Strange Indian TV channels…
He’ll be sacked as CM.
He’ll lose as CM.
He’ll never be PM candidate.
BJP will just fall short.
May 16: We were right! We were right! We were right!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru