October 2013 Status Updates

Many years ago, they made a Tryst with Corruption.
At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the whole world slept, they looted the nation.

Both Rohit and Ishant made their international debuts in 2007.
Since one Sharma has come really good in 2013, they are hoping the other one will come good too.

Alice in Wonderland: I try to believe in as many as six impossible things before breakfast.
Diggy Raja: I try to say as many as six impossible things before dinner.

Congress strategy for 2014…
The Food Security Bill is the Aadhar for our personal NREGA (Nehru-Gandhi-Dynasty Recurring Employment Guarantee Assurance scheme).

(October 31)

A tale of 4 Gujaratis…
Gandhi liberated India.
Jinnah created Pakistan.
Patel united India.
Next in line: Modi.

As Indian election symbols include every object under the sun, polls will now be held during power shutdowns at night with fluorescent election booths.

If Narendra Modi takes over as PM, he could well say…
Humko mita sake ye zamaane main dum nahi, humse hai zamaana, zamaane se hum nahi…

Madhya Pradesh Congress wants EC to hide “Lotus” ponds from voters.
What next?
Roam around with your “Hands” in your pockets till elections?

(October 30)

Before you judge anyone, walk a mile in their shoes.
If you do this with everyone you judge, you will find yourself somewhere in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

We have some “Breaking Information” announces an Indian TV anchor.
I think most information is broken only by the time it hits TV channels.

(October 28 )

Yell in office.
Keep walking out of office.
Be corrupt.
Promote your family (Nepotism).
Drown your country & save yourself.
Live long.
(Reference: Indian Politicians)

USSR=Big Brother watching over all its citizens.
USA=Super Big Brother watching over all global citizens.

Obama: I spy with my little eye something beginning with M.
Merkel: Oh God! I thought it was a game. I didn’t think it would actually be my mobile!

(October 27)

Yesterday: How many movies are in the Bollywood Rs 100 Crore Club?
Today: How many cities are in the Onion Rs 100/kg Club?

Very soon Bollywood will release an exclusive list of stars who are not in the Rs 100 Crore Club.

If Ranbir Kapoor and Virat Kohli require deodorant to get female attention, then most of the girls in India will surely remain single.

(October 26)

Main bhi Sachin Tendulkar ban-na chahata hu.
#Onion #Petrol #Dollar #Century

(October 22)

© Sunil Rajguru

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