Kejri baba will do everything but governance

Do we need our IIT graduates to sell detergents?
—Pranab Mukherjee.
No, we need them to do non-stop dharna, anarchy and nautanki!

If all the elections were held simultaneously, Kejri would be a CM candidate for 29 states and also PM candidate.

AAP planning 29 clones of Kejri for 29 CMs. Original will eventually become PM.

Odd day Delhi CM.
Even day Punjab CM.
Delhi-Chandigarh flight just 1 hour.

Garbage Chief Minister.
Garbage party.
Garbage politics.
Garbage city.

Raasto se karwa tak,
Is zamee se aasma tak,
Mai hi mai hu mai hi mai hu,
Doosra koi nahi,
Mujhko dekhoge jaha tak,
Mujhko paoge waha tak!

Kejri during 2020 Delhi elections…
I successfully blamed Modi for all of Delhi’s problems from 2015-20.
Vote for me and I’ll do the same for 2020-25!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

AAP nahin sudhrega musings…

Abuse Modi.
Attack LG.
Cry victim.
Move court.
Get summoned to court.
Get bail.
Holiday in style.
Blame blame blame.
Anything but work.

AAP wanted to be…
Greatest political party.
But is…
1. Greatest comedy show.
2. Greatest reality show.
3. Worst political party.

Modi trying to kill me.
Jung trying to ink me.
Nobody letting me work.
Poor me.
I’m the greatest.
Everyone hates me.
Everyone is jealous of me.
Boo hoo!
—Sri Sri Kejri Baba.

Kapil Sharma: I want to join politics.
Advisor: You have an FIR against you. Now the ideal party for you to join is the AAP!

Kejriwal is surrounded by charlatans, law-breakers, goondas and misogynists.✘
Kejriwal hires charlatans, law-breakers, goondas and misogynists.✔

Dear AAP,
Our freedom fighters went to jail fighting for Independence and not for rape, murder and fraud.

AAP will sing in 2020…
Loot le ho duniya ko thenga dikhai ke,
Aisa koi saga nahi jisko thaga nahi,
Aisi maari langdi ki soya jaga nahi!

Kejri wanted to replace Pappu as the national alternative.
Instead he replaced him as the national joker.

AAP should rename itself to TuTuMainMain.

Kejri = Lalu.
1. Turning Delhi into Bihar.
2. Scam pe scam.
3. Abusive language.
4. Most MLAs turning criminals.
5. Will eventually rule from jail.

For Congress
For #AdarshLiberal

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

AAP: Noise and news both…

If service tax is to be charged from Modi’s rallies, then entertainment tax has to be charged for all of AAP’s activities.

Arvind Kejriwal gives 100% to most of his allegations.
0% new proof + 100% noise.

Delhi is brash, arrogant, rude and angry.
AAP is brash, arrogant, rude and angry.
Pyaar to hona hi tha!

Salman watching Kejriwal on TV saying…
My Jai Ho hero couldn’t give such great entertainment fighting corruption!
No wonder it wasn’t a big hit!

Main: Hero!
Ambani: Villain!
Congress-BJP: Sidekicks!
Delhi: Bollywood!
Parting shot…
Picture abhi baaki hai mere dost!
—Arvind Kejriwal.

Kejriwal says that Congress and BJP are the same.
AAP is different.
I agree.
At least Congress and BJP can rule a country.
AAP can’t even rule a city.

PM possibility: Modi.
Leader of Opposition possibility: Pappu.
Third Front outside chance PMs: Jaya and Mamata.
Not even in the picture: Kejriwal.

Historic highs of Lok Sabha seats…
Congress: 416.
BJP: 182.
AAP: 0.
Yet all three are equal for the mainstream media.

Kya aapne Congress ko vote diya?
Kya AAPne Congress ko vote diya?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru