And they can’t stop the Modi juggernaut…

Red is dead.
Saffron is on.

Before 2014, nationwide Congress always had more MLAs than BJP.
Now Congress has close to 800 and BJP 1400 odd.

100 days before a poll: Modi haarega haarega!
50 days: haarega!
10 days: haarega!
1 day: haarega!
D-Day: Arre jeet gaya! Chalo next time…

Big 3 of World Tennis.
Fed. Rafa. Djoko.
Big 3 of Indian politics.
Nehru. Indira. Modi.

Bihar had the Mahagatbandhan.
Retrospectively the UP Pappu + Akhilesh alliance can be called the Mahagadbad.

Anna is threatening another agitation, against Modi.
Means he’s opening another political training course for Kejri ka sequel.

2011. All politicians are corrupt—Kejri.
2017. Kejri is corrupt—All politicians.

Does anyone remember that 6 years back the nation came to a standstill, an old man fasted, a new party was born over Lokpal?
Where’s the Lokpal?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

My Complete Narendra Modi Columns

Modi haters must reconcile with the fact that Modi is here to stay
March 11, 2017,

I expect Modi to take bolder, hardline, controversial decisions in 2017, December 5, 2016

Modi haters are only making it worse for India
June 22, 2016,

Has Swamy replaced Jaitley as Modi’s new mukhauta?
May 13, 2016,

Modi doesn’t want India to see another Kalam for president
March 31, 2016,

Modi Haters Will Outrage And Fume Till 2019 No Matter What
February 2, 2016,

How Modi made Pakistan irrelevant in India’s foreign policy
December 26, 2015,

8 reasons Modi will do absolutely nothing about Ram Mandir
November 30, 2015,

And you Thought Modi Was Doing Nothing?
November 30, 2015,

5 reasons why Modi doesn’t give regular interviews or press conferences
November 26, 2015,

Acchhe Din Are Already Here
November 26, 2015,

25 controversies of Narendra Modi
November 16, 2015,

Narendra Modi: The Man Who Bounces Back
November 9, 2015,

8 #BlowToModi moments in 2015
November 9, 2015,

Something Went Wrong with You? Just blame Modi
November 3, 2015,

Don’t blame Modi for Godhra if you are ready to spare Gandhis
October 28, 2015,

Right to malign Modi a fundamental MSM right
April 13, 2015,

Rise of the outsiders in Indian politics
January 21, 2015,

My Narendra Modi Columns till 2014

The Modi Haters will never give up…

Modi’s knowledge of economics can be written on the back of a postage stamp.
—P Chidambaram.
Chidu’s bosses’ (Pappu and Sonia) knowledge of everything can be written on the back of a postage stamp.

Modi Hater on the glass half-full half-empty analogy…
The glass is tainted, it is half empty and the other half is contaminated water.

Abusing Modi in the comfort of their lavish Lutyens’ homes, they even have a problem with Modi being politely addressed as “Mr Prime Minister” in an interview.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

In how many steps can you reach Modi?

Udta Punjab shows how bad the situation of Punjab is.
Punjab is ruled by the Badals.
Badals are aligned with the BJP.
BJP = Modi!

Udta Punjab was almost banned by censor board.
Censor board chief is Pahalaj Nihalini.
Nihalini was appointed by I&B Ministry.
I&B Minister reports to Modi.

Or simply…

Dadri is a sign of worsening law and order in the country.
This country is ruled by Modi.

There is intolerance in the country.
This country is ruled by Modi.

The economy of this country is going nowhere.
This country is ruled by Modi.

© Sunil Rajguru

The latest round of Modi musings…

Supporters of Sonia: Neutral.
Supporters of Kejri: Neutral.
Supporters of Lalu: Neutral.
Supporters of Modi: Fill in blanks with expletives.

Who is greater? Sachin or Kohli? At least that’s a debate.
What of ‪#‎AdarshLiberals‬ who still think Pappu-Kejri-Kanhaiya each is greater than Modi?

Pappu will challenge Modi! (44 LS seats)
No Kejri will challenge Modi! (4 LS seats)
Errr Kanhaiya will challenge Modi! (CPI 1 LS seat)

The man* who does things makes many mistakes, but he never makes the biggest mistake of all: Doing nothing**!
—Benjamin Franklin
*Modi **MMS

Before: Don’t put caste or religion in headline, makes it look bad.
Now: Don’t put caste or religion in headline, unless it makes Modi look bad.

Modi to launch Stand Up India.
Pappu launched Stand Up Comedy India many years back.

Most ‪#‎OpinionPolls‬ in…
2002: Modi will lose.
2004: NDA will win.
2007: Modi will lose.
2009: UPA-NDA neck and neck, UPA slightly ahead.
2012: Hung Assembly in UP.
2014: BJP will not get 272.
2015: Some polls said Mahagatbandhan would win clearly. Some said NDA would win clearly. One gave such a range that MGB win, NDA win and hung Assembly was in a single poll!
Yet we fall for them every time.
Every single time!

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The most hated politician marches on…

Indian media attacks Modi.
Foreign media attacks Modi.
Civil Society attacks Modi.
Opposition leaders attack Modi.
BJP leaders attack Modi.
Modi must be fully made of Teflon by now.

2002: Will lose Gujarat.
2007: Will lose Gujarat.
2013: Won’t get PM candidate.
2014: Won’t win India.
Jokers already predicting how he’ll lose 2019.

Overheard somewhere…
JAS quarter Intolerance ka tha.
OND Vendetta pe gaya.
Ab batao JFM quarter ka kya agenda hai bhai?

These versions by Sunil Rajguru