Stages of proving someone guilty…
Stage 1: Allegations.
Stage 2: Chargesheet.
Stage 3: Trial.
Stage 4: Conviction.
Some are accepted and loved even after Stage 4.
#Laloo #Jaya
Some today are generally ignored even at Stage 3.
#ARaja
Some are considered squeaky clean and untouchable even at Stage 2.
#Sonia #Pappu
Some are attacked virulently 24X7 for years even at the sniff of entering Stage 1.
#Modi
© Sunil Rajguru
All opponents to the Dynasty are kicked out in the Congress.
All opponents to the Kejri are kicked out in the AAP.
We are a party for the common man—Pappu.
We are a party for the aam aadmi—Kejri.
I saw tears in Sonia’s eyes—Khurshid.
I saw tears in Kejriwal’s eyes—Ashutosh.
Laloo convict hua to kya, hamara pyaara hai—Congress.
Laloo convict hua to kya, hamara pyaara hai—AAP.
Our Supreme Leader is actually very democratic—Congressi.
Our Supreme Leader is actually very democratic —AApian.
We are not Communists but pro-poor socialists.—Congressi.
We are not Communists but pro-poor socialists.—AApian.
Wear topi to look secular, actually pahanao topi to all—Congress.
Wear topi to look secular, actually pahanao topi to all—AAP.
Sonia mahaan hai, Modi villain hai—Congress.
Sonia mahaan hai, Modi villain hai—AAP.
© Sunil Rajguru
Ticketless traveller…
Aana free aur jaana free, pakade gaye to khaana free.
Politician…
Aane main bhaut kharcha, jaane lage to koi poochta nahin, par elect hue to aana, jaana, khaana, gaana, bajaana, paana, whateveraana… sab kuch free hi free!
Since the great man is no more, let’s have a productive Parliament session discussing key issues close to the great man’s heart…
…said no MP ever!
Jab tak rahega samose main aloo,
Tab tak rahega media ka Laloo-worship chaloo.
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
She is the worst ever party president who gave us the worst ever Prime Minister who presided over the worst ever Central rule and she replaced the best ever Indian President with the worst ever one and now she is desperately trying to thrust upon the nation an individual who potentially could be the worst ever party president and Prime Minister rolled into one and yet if you look at the media coverage from 2004-14 you could be forgiven for thinking that she’s the best ever thing that had ever happened to India while her political rival was India’s worst ever Prime Minister even before he took his oath of office.
© Sunil Rajguru
Congressi advisor—Say exactly opposite of Modi, OK?
Kejri—OK!
Modi—Hum Bharat ka vikaas karenge!
Kejri —Hum Delhi ka vinaash karenge!
Kejri…
(2011) We will end corruption…
(2012) …by forming a political party…
(2014) …and coming to power…
(2015) …and joining hands with fodder scam convict Laloo!
AAP will bring New Delhi up to international standards by 2020.
(i.e. Greece)
These versions by Sunil Rajguru
Money Kejri needs to spruce up Delhi—A few thousand crores.
Money Kejri will spend on self-promoting ads—A few thousand crores.
Time TV news channels will spend praising Kejri for no rhyme or reason—A few thousand per month.
Time the same TV news channels will spend blasting Kejri after the above—A few thousand per month.
Time Kejri will spend blaming Modi/Jung/Bassi—A few thousand man hours.
Number of bad ideas Kejri would have given Delhi by the end of his term—A few thousand.
Number of true Kejri supporters that will be left by the end of his term—A few thousand.
© Sunil Rajguru