Yet another round of Modi musings…

The biggest Opposition to the Congress has been the Congress.
The biggest Opposition to Narendra Modi is the BJP.

The Modi Industry…
Stage 1: Fame.
Stage 2: Fortune.
Stage 3: Industry Status.
Stage 4: Very own political party.

The AAP media marriage…
Stage 1: Honeymoon.
Stage 2: Marital fights.
Stage 3: Divorce.
(When it comes to Modi-media, it looks like the reverse)

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, and finally they scramble to be your ally partner.
#NaMo #NDA #2014Polls

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

The AAP dictionary…

Aaptopia: An imaginary island where everything in the AAP has reached absolute perfection whereas the rest of the world is 100% imperfect.

Aapocracy: A form of democracy which favours rule-breaking, vigilantism, dharnas and violent attacks on rivals.

Aaponomics: Oppose FDI, increase subsidies, threaten power companies, run down industrialists… anything to get in the news the economy be damned.

Aapolitics: A form of politics if the ruling government is corrupt, inept and venal, then support should be taken from the ruling party in order to attack the Opposition.

Aapinion polls: If the verdict of the aam aadmi suits you, follow it. If it doesn’t, then do what the hell you want.

Aaptard: The new Namotard, more brain-dead and more potent.

Aapportunism: The philosophy by which the party will grab whatever opportunity comes along their path no matter whether it suits their ideology or not.

Aappearances: As long as you are appearing on media on a regular basis, absolutely nothing else matters.

Aapper Class: Members of this class pretend to be Aam Aadmis but are actually Khaas Aadmis.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Kejriwal the Aam Politician…

The A to Z of Arvind Kejriwal…
A: Aam Aadmi is what I am, plain and simple.
Z: Z Security is what I accept, plain and simple.

Stone pelting.
Private plane.
Z Security.
Indian politician: Sob! He is finally one of us!

1970s: Imagine George Fernandes getting arrested and blaming and attacking Morarji Desai non-stop instead of Indira Gandhi.
2014: Fernandes=Kejri. Morarji=Modi. Indira=Sonia.

We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.
—TS Eliot.
What a fool! I just take one U-turn and I am back where I started and I pretend to know the place for the first time.
—Arvind Kejriwal.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

Kejriwal’s Theatre of The Absurd continues…

Kejriwal: Paid media, paid media, paid media…
Q: Who paid for your private plane ride?
Kejriwal: Media paid.

Party of the TV by the TV for the TV in the TV across the TV inside the TV due to TV embrace the TV attack the TV live by TV die by TV.

A future jail scene…
Convict A: I’m a drug addict and one day I went too far.
Convict B: I’m a gambling addict and one day I went too far.
Kejriwal: I’m a media coverage addict and one day I went too far.

What if you went to a movie and saw 16 back-to-back item songs instead of the movie?
That sums up AAP’s existence till now.

Spot the difference…
Attend swearing-in ceremony by small private car.
Attend media ceremony by small private plane.

Kuch bhi kaho, the NaMo-Pappu-Kejru political campaign may be the most entertaining ever in Independent India’s history.

Mr Clean Rajiv: Bofors.
Mr Clean MMS: Scam buffet.
Mr Clean Antony: Defence scams-disasters.
Mr Clean Kejriwal: Anarchy-hypocrisy.
Clean is the new Dirty.

The AAP wanted to replace BJP as the alternative.
Instead it is replacing the Congress as the most hated.

Brilliant team…
Kejriwal & Co. for activism.
Journos Ashutosh-Shazia to ensure media coverage.
Lawyers Bharti-Bhushan to defend them in court.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

When the AAP turned to violence…

Under AAP, India’s GDP will rise exponentially.
(Goondagardi Dharnas Personal attacks)

With all the FIRs being filed against AAP even if they eventually do come to power, their leaders will have to take oath of office on bail.

Every party = Violence + Arrogance + + Corruption + Governance.
AAP = Violence + Arrogance.
No Governance.
No Corruption but only because No real chance to do it yet.

Step 1: Provoke, create nuisance in enemy ground.
Step 2: Shout at authorities to get detained.
Step 3: Use it as pretext to attack rival.
Step 4: Rival hits back.
Step 5: Media spotlight back!
Mission accomplished!

They wanted to be…
The First Party.
They have become…
The FIR party.
#Dharna #KhirkiRaid #BJPOfficeAttack

Hum eenth ka jawaab pathar se denge,
Aur Indian politics ko Stone Age me le jaayenge.

It’s the BJP’s fault.
Kejriwal is the law.
How can he be retained even if it’s his fault?

Delhi to sirf jhaaki hai,
Saara Bharat baaki hai.

AAP: We will replace the BJP!
(Not happening!)
AAP: OK, we will replace the Congress.
(Not happening!)
AAP: OK, we will replace the MNS.
(Ah, possible!)

The AAP is like the weakling who keeps provoking the bully.
If the bully keeps quiet, provocation continues, if he hits back then the weakling gets sympathy.

Pre-1947: Mahatma Gandhi masters the art of peaceful protests.
2014: The grandson of Mahatma Gandhi participates in a protest that turns violent.

Kejriwal: I would like to thank Modi’s Gujarat for arresting me. I am back in the headlines again! Yippeeee!!!!!

Q: How will Kejriwal end criminalization of politics?
A: By breaking multiple laws.
#CuttingPowerConnections #Dharnas #Section144 #Vigilantism #Defamation #ModelCodeOfConduct

These versions by Sunil Rajguru

AAP: The party with a difference…

Arrogance of Congress
+ Infighting of BJP
+ Violence of SP
+ Ego of Mayawati
+ Ideology of CPM
+ Nautanki of Laloo
+ Modus operandi of MNS

The ABC of Indian politics…
AAP. BJP. Congress.
Congress = Ruling party.
BJP = Principal opposition.
AAP = Famous without a reason.

If the AAP got one vote for every sound bite across hundreds of channels day in and day out, then Kejriwal would easily become Prime Minister.

Jo darr gaya,
samjho mar gaya.
—Gabbar Singh in Sholay 1975.
Jo dharna gaya,
samjho AAP mar gaya.
—Gabbar Kejriwal in Sholay 2014.

These versions by Sunil Rajguru